halfdarkened | Where are we, anyway?

[There's a pause. After a moment comes a thoughtful reply.]

...The stopping is easy. Just don't use darkness. The reversing... I don't know. I... I don't know any of that. [His attempts to hide his concern are weak.] There's still a lot about hearts we don't know.

I... I still use darkness, even almost becoming a Heartless. Just not the same way. So the heart has to be healing...

Tch, that's easy for you to say. Maybe... Maybe... How can you tell what kind of darkness is taking over? Is it the kind used in magic or... Or some other kind? Some kind of... other power.

Kind of darkness? ...Where I'm from, all darkness you use comes from your heart. Same goes for light. So if you use dark magic, you'd be using your heart's darkness, probably. It's how it goes where I'm from.

But where I'm from, you can't store memories outside your heart. If all my memories were taken out, my heart would collapse. And I'd be a Heartless just from that.

Maybe it's different for you.

...Probably.

There's different magic. It's more complicated than just that. ...Maybe we're talking about different types. [there are a lot of maybes there and how much of this is him trying to make himself feel better, he doesn't know. Seriously. He probably doesn't even recognize the latter reason]

You don't take out all of your memories. Why the hell would you do that? You'd just end up useless. It's just the kind that people can take advantage of.

There's different magics for us, too.

How do you do that? [Voice grows a little more serious.] Who else can undo the links of someone's memory?

I don't know exactly how it works. I'll have to ask the attendant a few questions when I get back. What do you mean by "links."

Memories are formed in chains. You remember one thing, which leads to another and another. Ever almost forgot someone's name? But remembered the first letter? And then you finally figured out what the name was? That name was a link in your chain of memories that was falling into the darkness of your heart, which means you can't remember it. Sometimes links get tangled, or, sometimes they might come apart. Links don't come undone too often by themselves, but they'll just dip into darkness.

But I knew someone who could undo those links and rearrange memories.

Mm. I think I know what you're talking about. So forgetting is linked to darkness, too.

How?

Yeah. You forget things, but never really lose your memories. That's why things are familiar sometimes when you can't remember them.

Couldn't tell you. She could only do it to people Sora was connected to. Me included.

...Oh.

Seems like a pretty useless power to me, if it only works on a handful of people like that.

Useless? That ended up being used against us at one point. But she also could have used it to lock up A-- ...To lock up the darkness in my heart, too. I never was one to take the easy way out, though.

[pingping] She can lock up that kind of darkness? Permanently?

I... Mine was a little different. Guess you could say I had a lot extra.

Edited 2010-09-06 07:30 (UTC)

...How much. [it's almost more of a demand than an answer, and yet it's said with a certain amount of understanding]

Enough I almost lost it all. [That reply came very quickly and very bluntly.]

[there's a silence on Mao's end as he takes that in. He'd expected to give a response quickly, yet... And now with all these weird emotions bubbling up inside him that he doesn't understand... Is that... fear?]

A nagging feeling telling you to give in... Waiting and watching for a moment of weakness... But it actually can?

[There's a slight click as Riku begins to talk, but without the dedication to continue, his voice just cracks and there's a long silence. When he replies his voice is extremely firm.]

...Actually can what?

...Take over. I always thought it was just a warning.

...What's it to you, anyway?

[another moment of hesitation. A part of him wants to say something, having never met anyone else with that sort of evil mind lurking within before, and yet...]

Why do you want to know? You didn't have to tell me anything. You could have just avoided the subject altogether. Why didn't you? [he genuinely doesn't get it. That's what he's always done. Why would someone else be so forthright?]

Nothing. It's nothing. I was guessing and... You're the one who said everything to begin with! Who... who made me have to worry like that. [his voice grows in intensity, so confused at this point that all he can do is toss out blame] Everything that you said was all a lie, wasn't it! Just because someone says that it's true doesn't make it true! You and that... Almost losing everything... It doesn't have to take over. It can just stay away. There's no erosion or danger or anything like that!

That power... That damn power is useless! It's useless!

Hey, relax a second.

[There's a pause on his end. It wasn't just the outburst that caught his attention.]

"...It doesn't have to take over." [Another pause.] I never said anything about something taking over.

[This pause... is eteeeerrrrrrnaaaaal.]

Have you ever been possessed by a Heartless?

I--! Damn you...

No! I've never been possessed by one of those things! Just... Just drop it!

Hm. [There's another pause, and his initial words sound incredulous.] Let me reword that then.

Have you ever been possessed by a Heartless too?

"Too..."

I already told you. No. It... He...

It isn't a Heartless. I've seen those Heartless. I've attempted to dissect them myself. That isn't a Heartless. It's just...

["too..."]

Another part of my heart. An annoying one.

"Another part" of your heart...

...A dark part of your heart?

Where are we, anyway?

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